Wednesday, December 9, 2015

My Top 12 Cartoon Crushes

            Hey everyone.  It's David here back with yet another Top 12 list on my blog and since my birthday is this coming weekend, I wanted to do a little something special this time around.  As you've already seen from the title here, I'm going to be counting down my Top 12 Cartoon Crushes.  As I've seen many movies and TV Shows (and even some video games) that incorporate hand drawn animation and even CG animation, there's a pretty fair amount of animated hotties that I've come across in my time with plenty to choose from.  This list is probably going to be one of my more polarizing lists as I focus on what I personally find attractive.



            With that said, looks aren't everything in this list.  I'm also going to be including my selections based on their characteristics and personality traits as I often find myself getting very invested in those aspects and being able to relate more with them.  Some characters that you might find attractive I might not necessarily have on my list and that's fine.  Everyone has their own opinions of what they may see as beauty and not everyone will agree 100% of the time with everyone else.



            In addition to that, not all of these characters are necessarily human so be sure to keep that in mind as you're looking through this list.  Finally, I'm officially bringing back the "Honorable Mentions" category.  I know I didn't use it in my past 2 countdowns, but that was because I wanted to keep it fair and even between both of them.  So, with all that said, sit back and enjoy My Top 12 Cartoon Crushes.







XII.  Rapunzel - Tangled



            Tangled is one of those movies that I really enjoyed the first time I saw it and still enjoy even now.  One of my favorite aspects of it was how it cleverly fixed some major plot holes that the original Grimm Brothers fairy tale never even addressed.  But one of the most enjoyable aspects is the character of Rapunzel herself.



            After her mother, the queen, was given a magical flower to heal her from an illness she suffered from while pregnant with her, Rapunzel gained the ability to heal others and restore youth with her hair when a special incantation is sung.  But Mother Gothel, who had previously horded the plant's power for herself for centuries, breaks into the castle and steals the infant Rapunzel, hiding her away in a secluded tower where she can constantly take advantage of her magic hair to stay forever young.



            Rapunzel isn't that much different from some of the other Disney Princesses who "long for more than what their current life has to offer", but you know what?  She's been locked away in a tower for most of her life, never having the opportunity to go outside as Mother Gothel tells her of all the horrors that lurk out there to keep her in that mindset of staying where she is so I think we can let it slide here.



            When she does finally leave her tower, with the help of a dashing thief named Flynn Rider (AKA Eugene Fitzherbert), we get to see that she's very adaptable and has hidden strength that she never even knew she had.  I mean, her ability to stand up to a gang of ruffians and thugs is super badass.  She can even utilize her long hair (which is 70 feet long) as a weapon or use it as a rope to swing away from danger.



            While she does have some of her more serious moments, where we get to see that she won't just take shit from anyone, she also has a very fun, bubbly side to her, but not to the point where she's a ditz.  She's just an overall fun character which is why she makes my list.








XI.  Holo - Spice And Wolf




            Holo is a rather interesting entry as her youthful appearance hides the fact that she's really hundreds of years older than she looks at a first glance.  Despite her teenaged appearance, she's actually an ancient wolf deity, a goddess of wheat harvests.



            Holo had stayed in the small town of Pasloe as part of a deal made long ago that she would provide the villagers with good harvests every year, but the people there found alternative means to ensure plentiful harvests therefore no longer having any need for her.  So when a travelling merchant by the name of Kraft Lawrence comes across her, they make a deal that he'll take her back to her home in the far north which she has been away from for centuries.



            The design of Holo herself is particularly interesting as, in her human form, she still retains her wolf ears and tail (both of which she takes great pride in).  Another aspect is how she talks.  In spite of her teenaged appearance, she speaks with great wisdom (sometimes even pridefully, though not out of conceitedness), but at the same time, she can also be a great jokester.  She's just a lot of fun all around.







X.  Yuko Kanoe - Dusk Maiden Of Amnesia



            First an ancient wolf deity and now a ghost.  Y'all are probably wondering "What the fuck kind of list is this?"  XD  Yuko is the ghost that haunts the old building of the school that Teiichi Niiya attends, but she knows next to nothing about her past.  Along with Teiichi's friends, Momoe Okonogi and Kirie Kanoe (the granddaughter of Yuko's sister), they set out to find the answers to Yuko's mysterious background.



           Yuko herself is very interesting as she's very playful and mischievous especially with Teiichi.  At first, she's kind of a character that one might have a very hard time trusting early on, but as the series progresses and we discover the circumstances that led to her death, which I won't give away what happens, you find yourself feeling absolutely devastated for her.  There's a particularly emotional scene where Teiichi experiences how she died and he feels completely helpless to prevent it and rightfully so.



            If you guys haven't seen Dusk Maiden Of Amnesia yet, check it out sometime.  It has a great story, great characters, and some awesome animation.  Seriously, their use of color throughout the series is beautiful to look at.







IX.  Lucy/Nyu - Elfen Lied



            This is definitely shaping up to be an interesting list as I've now gone from a deity to a ghost to essentially a mutant.  Lucy is a Diclonius (a mutant recognized by a pair of horns on her head and her ability to summon invisible hands known as "vectors" which she often uses to kill people in gruesome fashion), trapped in a facility where Diclonii are subjected to inhumane experiments.  Managing to escape, she gets shot in the head, resulting in brain damage and the creation of a childlike split personality named "Nyu", and gets taken in by 2 cousins (one of whom has a past connection with her) who care for her as government agents scour the nearby city looking for her.



            This character has 2 separate personalities that couldn't be any further apart from each other.  Lucy is a cold blooded killer with very little (if any) remorse and Nyu is a wide eyed innocent who wouldn't harm a fly.  Much like Yuko, though, there are a few episodes dedicated to Lucy's backstory as a little girl that, again I won't give away but, you just really sympathize with her and find yourself unsure of whether you should fear her or hug her.  Doug Walker mentioned in a video that "one of the scariest things about the scariest creatures is that they are human and that any of us can become these things at any time" which I believe is what helps make Lucy a very relatable character in the process.



            For anyone who wants to watch this Anime, I give you my warning that it's not for the faint of heart.  There's some very graphic and often disturbing imagery used throughout the series.  If you can stomach it, though, go right on ahead.







VIII.  Mikasa Ackerman - Attack On Titan



            O.K.  Heading back to some sense of normality, we've got one of the last known remaining Asians in the world of Attack On Titan.  Mikasa's parents were killed by slave traders who then took her captive when she was young... well... young-er.  Series protagonist Eren Yeager discovered her and the 2 of them effectively killed off her captors.  Because of this, Mikasa is very protective of Eren who's become an adoptive brother to her.  So, when monstrous zombie giants known as Titans attack, threatening to end humanity as we know it, she and Eren undergo training to fight off these monsters.



            Mikasa, for the most part, is a very stoic and quiet character except when Eren's in danger.  This partially comes from her having to kill one of her captors at a young age to save Eren's life.  In the military training program, she graduates at the top of her class and is acknowledged as a prodigy, being the first in her group to successfully take down a Titan.



            Her stoic nature hides a very warm and heartfelt sibling-like relationship between her and Eren and those moments are pretty nice to see.  An undeniable badass with a heart, Mikasa slices her way to the #8 spot.







VII.  Katara - Avatar: The Last Airbender



             Avatar: The Last Airbender is very easily one of the greatest animated shows of all time.  It had great writing, memorable characters with excellent development, and engaging dilemmas.  So, very easily, one of my absolute favorite characters from the show would be young Waterbender, Katara of the Southern Water Tribe.



            Despite being only a teenager, Katara finds herself having to grow up relatively quickly over the course of the show's 3 seasons.  She's shown to be very caring with strong motherly instincts (presumably after her own mother was killed by a Fire Nation soldier), but at the same time she proves her badassery at countless moments when fighting off enemies, displaying great strength on numerous occasions.



            One of the more interesting Katara moments was in a Season 3 episode where a reformed Zuko, in an attempt to get back into Katara's good graces, offers to lead her to the man who killed her mother so that she can get her revenge on him.  When she's finally face to face with her mother's murderer, she sees how truly pathetic he is and decides not to kill him.  But in a shocking moment, she refuses to forgive him.



            This seems almost like a really big "no no" for most shows, especially kids' shows, but at the same time it's something quite ingenious as it more closely mirrors real life with its handling of the subject in question.  Katara is just a really great character by every means of the word.







VI.  Yuno Gasai - Future Diary



            Anyone familiar with Future Diary already knows full well about Yuno's background as the essential "poster girl" for the yandere character type in Anime.  What's that?  You don't know what a yandere is?  Well, for those of you who don't know, the word yandere is a portmanteau of the Japanese words "yanderu", referring to someone with a mental or emotional illness, and "deredere", which refers to strong feelings of love for someone.  Thus a yandere is a person who is initially very kind, loving, and gentle to someone they truly like and care about until they become mentally destructive in nature, usually, but not always, through either overprotectiveness, violence, brutality, or all three.



            Yuno is definitely someone you do not want to get on the wrong side of.  She proves herself to be very protective of/loyal to main protagonist, Yukiteru Amano, when both of them are thrust into essentially a more badass version of The Hunger Games with the winner becoming the new god of Time and Space, where she's shown to be quite handy with an axe, hacking her way through any foe that gets in her way, but she still has some of her more softer moments where she's genuinely caring towards Yuki, willing to protect him from anyone who tries to harm him, while he slowly starts to gain feelings for her in the process.



            There's also a very interesting twist that plays out in the final few episodes that I won't ruin but is still cool to see.  If you do decide to watch this, be sure you watch the OVA afterwards as it properly wraps up the series.  Even though she's a bit psycho, I'm still pleased to have her on my list.







V.  Elsa - Frozen



            I know that this is kind of a more recent Disney character, but I can't help it.  It's just a really nice design and a great personality to go along with it.  You guys all know the basic story here so I'm not really gonna talk about that and instead focus on the character of Elsa.



            Elsa is a character that I really related to a lot as both me and her were kind of reserved and somewhat insecure.  Those emotions were very relatable for me as I happened to be going through a particularly hard time myself of nervousness and uncertainty.



            But the one part that I always enjoyed watching was the "Let It Go" scene where I got to see Elsa letting her guard down and being able to let loose with her abilities.  Just the look of joy on her face as she's singing and testing out what she can really do with her magic is soo much fun.



            She's also very protective of her sister, Anna, who she doesn't want to hurt again after nearly killing her accidentally when they were younger so as a result she distances herself from her.  That was also very relatable for me as I can be very protective of some of my own younger siblings, but not to the point where I distance myself from them.



            What I really liked about Elsa though was how she does move on to becoming queen, but, at the same time, isn't evil (like many queens Disney has had in the past) and is actually quite dignified, intelligent, and likable.  Hopefully, there will be plenty more well developed animated female characters like Elsa in the near future.







IV.  Tiana - The Princess And The Frog



            This is a really interesting character as I believe that she was essentially Disney's first workaholic.  Tiana is busy working 2-3 jobs in order to raise enough money to build her own restaurant, a dream that she shared with her late father.  Already, that's a character you don't typically see in kids' movies.  Not the one with the dead parent, but the one with a strong work ethic.



            Aside from a really great design, Tiana is a well grounded person full of determination and willingness to work hard to make her dream a reality.  Even after she's turned into a frog, she doesn't let that stop her.  If anything, she's even more driven than ever.



            Something that was kind of interesting was how, while the movie does do a good job of showing the importance of a strong work ethic, it also shows the workaholic aspect as a flaw in the sense that she never gave herself a break or a chance to just enjoy life, which is especially interesting when compared to Prince Naveen, who's the exact opposite by being too much of a party animal always avoiding responsibility, and how he eventually learns that life isn't just a party and you have to actually work in order to make a living.  It's a very delicate balance between the 2.



            The only downside to Tiana was the fact that she spends a majority of the movie as a frog.  Not that her frog design isn't good, but her human design was just soo great that when she's a frog I'm just like, "No!  She already looked great before!  Don't ruin it!"  But that's a minor gripe in all seriousness because she truly is a great character all things considered.







III.  Fluttershy - My Little Pony franchise




            Yeah yeah yeah.  I put a pony on my list.  Bite me.  If Doug Walker can put a gargoyle on his list of Hottest Animated Women, I can put a pony on mine.  And you know what?  She actually has a human counterpart in a parallel world.  So SHUT UP!!!!



            Now anyone who saw my Top 12 Movies I Dislike, But Everyone Else Loves list probably remembers a certain joke I made about how Fluttershy was basically telling Willie Scott from Temple of Doom to "grow a pair" and some of you might've thought that I was of the mindset that Fluttershy was a really weak character as might've been implied by that remark.  With all that said, nothing could be further from the truth.  I have nothing but extreme respect for her (originally I was going to use Bella Swan from Twilight in that joke, but then decided against it as I wasn't going to allow her to be dignified through that joke while I had absolutely no problem with dignifying Flutters).



            In the TV Show, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, Fluttershy is a very timid and socially awkward Pegasus who would much rather prefer the company of her animal friends than other ponies... at least that's how she starts off.  As the series progresses, we get to see her become a much stronger character.



            As I watched this show, I began to see Fluttershy grow as a character over the course of 5 seasons.  One episode earlier on in particular had her going along with her friends to get a dragon (which she's deathly terrified of) to leave before their town was covered in his smoke.  But when her friends get attacked by the dragon, suddenly, Fluttershy.  Is.  PISSED!!!  Despite the fact that she's about the size of this dragon's eyeball, she swiftly and angrily berates him, giving him such an intense verbal lashing to the point where she actually reduced him to tears.  I was just like, "DAAAAAAAAYUM!!!  You go girl!"



            She also gets plenty of moments to grow when she faces such challenges as overcoming her fear of failure from her fillyhood years at Summer Flight Camp to her fear of performing in front of an audience to even learning the very hard lesson that sometimes the kindest thing you can do to someone is to push them away.  Not to mention, whenever there's trouble, in spite of her fears, you always see her running with her friends towards the danger no matter what the threat.



            One moment that I particularly liked was in the Season 5 opener where they essentially made her the hero.  While I won't spoil anything plot wise, let's just say that she discovers a conspiracy within a rather shady group and she reveals it causing the whole infrastructure of that group to collapse.  It's definitely up there with my favorite episodes.



            Now, as I mentioned before, Fluttershy has a human counterpart in the Equestria Girls universe and she's still pretty damn cute.  A lot of people were probably bothered by the fact that these pony characters were portrayed as teenagers.  I wasn't personally (I had heard from somewhere that series creator, Lauren Faust, was quoted saying that a lot of the pony characters, particularly the Mane 6, were fully mature physically, but that their mentality was more along the lines of teenagers so I think it works fine here).



            When I was watching the first Equestria Girls movie, I was eagerly awaiting the first appearance of human Fluttershy.  When it finally did come, this was the first thing I saw.  My heart just melted instantly.  Some of my favorite aspects of her were on full display there from her long, smooth, flowing hair to her big, expressive eyes.  One of the things that I've really loved about Flutters was how kind her eyes appear.  The shape of them is just soo unique and perfect.  They just have a delicate softness to them.  You look at those eyes and you know that this is a kind character, which is pretty understandable when you take into account that she's the Element Of Kindness.



            There's also the fact that she's a major animal lover, something that I share with her.  In fact, seeing all 3 Equestria Girls movies has only further convinced me of what I've believed since first starting the show that she's Hasbro's version of a Disney Princess without actually being a princess.  In her reaction video for Friendship Games, YouTuber CellSpex said it best when she said that "Disney Princesses wish they had this girl's preciousness levels".



            I should probably also say that my heart breaks a little every time Flutters cries.  She's soo kind hearted it's really hard not to tear up when she does.  She's just such a sweet character and well deserving of the #3 spot.







II.  Belle - Beauty And The Beast



            As a kid growing up in the 90s, it only makes sense that Belle would be one of the first animated women I came across and with good reason too.  She's one of the first Disney Princesses that, while undeniably beautiful, is viewed by everyone else as being unconventional and odd (something that I'm sure many kids could relate to), but even then she has such a kind and compassionate personality to her.



            She sacrifices herself to remain the Beast's prisoner just to allow her father to go free which is definitely worth mentioning.  Additionally, she's one of those rare characters who seems almost like the best of humanity personified.  Not to mention she has such a beautiful look and voice (both speaking and singing).  Some people might point out that she's kind of "Mary Sue-ish" or not really having a lot of flaws to her, but she does have to look past the hideousness of the Beast to see the person inside which could technically be counted as a flaw.



            Beauty And The Beast came out in November of 1991 (approximately 1 month before I was born) and was the very first animated movie to be nominated for Best Picture Oscar (and is the only hand drawn animated movie to be nominated) which was unheard of at the time.  Belle was just such a great character and role model for many and rightfully so.



            Something that I was unaware of at first was the fact that a lot of people say that Belle was supposed to be a teenager in the movie.  But personally, I call bullshit on that.  Even as a kid, I knew that she looked and sounded like an adult.  Early 20s, maybe, but not a teen.  Still, this Beauty is definitely sitting pretty as runner up.







            Before I reveal my top pick, as promised, here are some Honorable Mentions.



Honorable Mentions:







Sunset Shimmer - Equestria Girls franchise



            It's incredible how a simple character can go from being one of the worst villains ever to easily one of my favorite protagonists.  While I didn't hate the first Equestria Girls movie like everyone else did, I knew that Sunset Shimmer was a pretty weak antagonist (though I now personally think that Principal Abacus Cinch from Friendship Games is even worse).  But when Rainbow Rocks came out, she was given excellent development as a reformed character struggling to overcome the demons of her past and Friendship Games brought her character arc full circle rather well.  In the end, she won her way into my heart with very little effort.







Kasumi - Dead Or Alive franchise



            This teenage shinobi princess is the main protagonist of the Dead Or Alive video game franchise.  Entering the DOA tournament to avenge her brother Hayate, who was left comatose after an attack by their renegade uncle, Kasumi becomes an outlaw of her own clan, constantly being sought after by assassins.  Kasumi has become very popular as one of the hottest video game characters ever with very good reason.  But she also kicks some serious ass when she needs to.







Kida - Atlantis: The Lost Empire



            Like Holo, Kida has the appearance of someone in their late teens/early 20s when she's actually about 8,000 years old.  However, while Holo was a deity, Kida looks young because of a crystal that she and other Atlanteans wear that's connected to the Heart Of Atlantis, which is essentially their life source allowing them to live 300 years for every one human year, making Kida physically about 26 in human years.  Aside from her looks, she has a very strong sense of loyalty to her people and a hunger to remember more of Atlantis' culture that's been lost over millennia.  So yeah.  Definitely an unusual one, but still well worth mentioning.







Misty - Pokemon



            This trainer of Water-Type Pokemon and leader of the Cerulean Gym was my first crush to ever come from Anime as she traveled alongside Ash and Brock for about 5 seasons, proving herself to be a rather loyal ally.  Her wardrobe is definitely interesting; the whole yellow tank top and jean shorts with suspenders is kind of unusual, but, strangely enough, she really manages to pull it off well.







Hazuki - Moon Phase



            Can't really have a list like this without including a vampire, even if it is only an Honorable Mention.  Hazuki is a young vampire who's been trapped in a castle for most of her life before being freed by photographer Kouhei Morioka.  Despite Kouhei being immune to Hazuki's vampire "kiss", the act of drawing blood from a mortal making them the feeding vampire's unwilling servant, Hazuki continuously refers to him as her slave, but over time the 2 genuinely start to care for each other.  Hazuki definitely has a very bossy and overbearing side to her, but she does prove to be truly loyal to those she cares most about which is enough for her to make this category.







Jasmine - Aladdin



            Again, growing up in the 90s, Jasmine was among the first animated females I was ever introduced to.  She definitely had some good characteristics to her such as sassyness, compassion, and being headstrong.  What kept me from putting her on the list, though, is the fact that she kind of falls into that "damsel in distress" category for the film's majority.  She fights for her independence like 1 time, but then just goes right back to her normal life after being brought back by her father's orders.  Still, those good qualities I listed earlier are enough for her to at least be mentioned.







Ruby Rose - RWBY



            The leader of Team RWBY in the world known as Remnant, Ruby Rose is a very fun loving and bubbly character with a great design.  But at the same time, she proves to be an undeniable badass as she wields her combination scythe/assault rifle, lovingly named the Crescent Rose, in the ongoing fight against the dark and deadly Creatures Of Grimm.







And finally...

Violet Parr - The Incredibles



            As I've mentioned before in a past post, The Incredibles is one of my all-time favorite Pixar movies and Violet is one of my favorite characters from the movie.  Aside from her powers of invisibility and force field projection, which I'm completely jealous of BTW, we get to see her grow throughout the movie from a quiet introvert with very little self confidence to being more sure of herself and more comfortable with her abilities.  Brad Bird always does a great job with creating animated women and Violet is no exception.







            So we've gone through a great number of animated hotties and it all comes down to this.  So without any further delay, my #1 Cartoon Crush is...







I.  Ariel - The Little Mermaid



            Many of you are probably upset that I didn't put Jessica Rabbit in this spot, but I don't care.  In all honesty, I've never really found her that attractive.  Her design I just find to be really weird, overexaggerated, and kind of gross actually.  There's just no way that a body like that can exist in real life.  I honestly think she makes Anime females look subtle, but I digress.



            Anyone who followed my previous blog posts will remember that I mentioned The Little Mermaid as one of my all-time favorite Disney movies and Ariel is a very strong reason why.  Not only was she beautiful, not only did she have a great design, not only did she have a great personality, not only did she have a beautiful speaking and singing voice, but she was also Disney's first ever proactive princess.



            Before Ariel, the only Disney Princesses we had were Snow White, Cinderella, and Aurora, all of them being relatively passive.  Aurora was the worst offender of this as her whole plan was to basically sit around, doing nothing while her true love comes to save the day, which is exactly what happens.  Not necessarily the best role model in that sense.



            Snow White and Cinderella, on the other hand, despite being limited with what they could do and still relying on someone else to save them, at least had some good virtues.  Snow White's personality serves as almost a mother for the dwarves and Cinderella is constantly working her ass off serving her evil stepmother and stepsisters and yet, somehow, manages to keep a positive outlook and sure enough both of them are rewarded for their hard work in the end, but I digress.



            Going back to Ariel, what I really loved about her was, again, how proactive she was.  She starts off as a very curious teenager, wanting to know as much as she can about the human world up above.  She even collects various human knick knacks in her own personal grotto.  One night, while exploring above, she spots Prince Eric on his ship celebrating his birthday and, when the ship winds up in a hurricane and he nearly drowns, she saves him.  Once she decides she wants to be with him, nothing will change her mind as she does whatever it takes to be by his side, no matter what the obstacles.



            Ariel was the first princess I felt actually did something about her situation.  She didn't even start off as desiring to meet her true love, but instead was more interested in knowing about this world up above that she has such little knowledge about.  But when she meets Eric and decides she wants to be with him, once again, she actually does something about it.  She's not just someone who just sits around waiting for "The Fates" to decide her life for her.  She has a goal and she's willing to fight to make her dream a reality.  Plus, while she does have to be saved by her prince in the end, she saved his life not once, but twice before that, making her more than just a simple case of "damsel in distress".



            Ariel is a character that I can, without a doubt, say that she was my first love as I had such a huge "little boy crush" on her back then and, in all honesty, I still kinda do to this day.  She certainly was the originator of my Mermaid fetish which is why she is my #1 Favorite Cartoon Crush of All Time.







            And that was my Top 12 Cartoon Crushes list.  I hope you enjoyed it and I'd like to know, "Which Cartoon Characters do you fancy?"  Feel free to comment below, hope you guys have a great week and I'll see you on the next post.  Take care.

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Follow up on the latest goings on

            Hey everyone on the interweb.  Sorry that I haven't been on here in a while but things have been relatively hectic the past several weeks.  Still nothing to report on the job front which is really frustrating as I've now gone over a year without finding a job.  One of the things that I'm worried is going to happen is that I'll have to go back to working at Six Flags next year which is far from preferable after a particular experience I had with a very inappropriate customer.  Still, I'm probably just going to have to go back there anyways if I can't get a job within the next few months.



            In addition to the job hunt, I've kept busy with buying presents for family members for upcoming birthdays and Christmas.  I've got almost everything figured out, but still need to wait for my next SSI checks to hit.  And while that's going on, I'm trying to save up what money I can to attend the Midwest Media Expo next April, which is hard when personal emergencies keep coming up.



            Speaking of the Midwest Media Expo, I finally, a couple weeks ago, got a package from veteran Disney animator James Lopez (famous for creating such characters as Timon from The Lion King, Pain and Panic from Hercules, and Dr. Facilier from The Princess And The Frog) who I got to meet at the very first Midwest Media Expo.  You see, he's in the process of trying to create a hand drawn animated steampunk movie by the name of Hullabaloo and last year he had an IndieGoGo campaign set up to fund the creation of a few animated shorts to bring to film festivals in order to get funding to produce the movie and I was one of the donors for the project.  The goal for the project was $80,000 and by the end of the campaign they had raised just south of $500,000.



            So, as one of the backers for the campaign, I got a lot of special perks such as a special T-Shirt, steampunk goggle sunglasses, a pin, a teacup charm, a colored sketch, 4 sets of blueprints (2 for vehicles, 1 for a ray gun, and 1 for a jetpack), and a lot of other stuff and that's just the physical perks.  There's also a butt load of digital perks that came with it which will later be followed by the animated shorts that they were able to make with the extra money.



            Aside from that, it's now been several weeks since I last talked to my uncle.  I've called him every week on his days off, but it seems like even on his days off he doesn't have days off.  Last I talked to him, he was talking about trying to come up to visit us sometime soon.  First it was Thanksgiving, then it was first week of November, and now it's first week of December and that's only if he can get the time off from work.  I really hope he and the family will be able to make it as it's been 2 years now since we last saw them, but also because he's one of the few relatives that I feel like I can be myself around.  Him and my grandma, mostly.



            Lately, I've also been doing a lot of work on some of my countdown lists for future blog posts.  The next one is going to hit sometime in December and even now I'm still changing stuff up and tweaking it.  Just this past week, I was reminded of an entry that I forgot to put on the list and had to change the lineup, bumping the #12 entry into the "Honorable Mentions" category.  Hopefully it'll be all figured out by the time I plan to post it.



            Finally, I would really appreciate it if you guys could be praying for my friend Caleb (yes, the same Caleb I mentioned that I had seen Tron: Legacy in theaters with in my Top 12 Movies I Like, But Everyone Else Hates list).  Caleb is feeling very suicidal right now and was just this past weekend admitted to the hospital for I don't know how long.  Me and one of my brothers visited him briefly last night and he seemed to be doing somewhat better, but I'm sure he would appreciate any support he can get right now.



            Anyways, that's pretty much it for me.  Hope you guys have a great rest of the week and I'll see you guys whenever the next post comes.  Take care.

Monday, October 19, 2015

All the latest going ons.

            Hey everyone on the interwebs.  Sorry that I haven't been on in a while, but these past several days have been pretty hectic.  My family went up to Old Orchard Beach 2 Thursdays ago for the weekend and it was a pretty fun time although it was kind of frustrating that the Pier was shut down for the season which meant that I wasn't able to take part in karaoke.  This was especially frustrating seeing as, the last time we were up, there the Pier wasn't doing karaoke until the exact same day that we were heading back home.  DAMMIT!!!!!!!!



            Aside from that, I got to hang out with a good buddy of mine from college for the first time in about a year.  We went and saw Hotel Transylvania 2 and laughed our asses off.  I've also been doing a lot of reading lately.  Just this past Tuesday, I got Dark Tide in the mail, the 3rd book in the WaterFire Saga, and I had it completely finished by Wednesday afternoon.  Another book I've been reading was one that I actually got from a bookstore up in Old Orchard Beach called Make Me A Star from Anastasia Brown, a judge on the short-lived Nashville Star.  I've found that it has a lot of great information regarding the music industry from many great acts like Heart, Matt Nathanson, Keith Urban, and Kelly Clarkson just to name a few.



           An idea that I just thought of recently when I was watching a reaction video to the latest Equestria Girls movie and watching some Schmoes Know videos on YouTube was the possibility of doing movie reviews on my blog.  I don't necessarily have that much money to do like every movie that comes out as I'm still trying to find a job (more on that later), but I figure that I could probably start off small and work my way up from there.  Maybe I could even review episodes of TV Shows I watch.



            Currently, though, my job search hasn't been that productive.  About 2 weeks ago I found out that GameStop was hiring so I filled out an application and turned it in the next day.  But then when I called back last week to follow up on it, the hiring manager said that they had already filled all the positions at a job fair that happened a month ago.  That was frustrating.  I also checked in with Hot Topic and they hadn't started hiring people yet.  I'm still willing to give them some time to square that away.



            Another thing to worry about is all the upcoming birthdays and Christmas.  Most of my family's birthdays are clumped pretty close together.  My dad's is November 30th, mine is December 12th, my mom's is the day after on the 13th, one of my brothers' is the week after on the 19th, then there's Christmas, and finally my sister's birthday on January 24th.  I'm in such desperate need for a job that it's not even funny.  After Six Flags closed for the season last year on November 2nd, I didn't go back this past April for personal reasons and have been looking for a job ever since.  Hell, even before the season ended I was still job searching.



           It really is a pain in the ass that I haven't been able to find a new job in almost a year and I'm running out of options.  I could really use some prayers right now as I continue the job quest.  But anyways, what would your guys' thoughts be about me featuring movie reviews on my blog?  Please feel free to leave a comment below on what you think about it and I appreciate you guys taking the time to read my rambling.  Anyways, hope you guys have a great week and I'll catch you on the flipside.  Later.

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Top 12 Movies I Like, But Everyone Else Hates

            Well, for those of you who tuned in last month, y'all know the Top 12 Movies I Dislike, But Everyone Else Loves.  So now, it's your turn to get your revenge on me as I count down the Top 12 Movies I Like, But Everyone Else Hates.  Now before I start this list, I want to point out that the list itself takes more after Doug Walker's list in the sense that I don't think that any of these are perfect movies that no one else aside from me seems to see the genius of, I acknowledge that they have faults (one of the problems that I had with Tony's list like this was that it seemed to be just him singing the praises of his selections).



            Still, I did manage to find some things in these movies that I genuinely enjoyed and made me glad that I had seen them.  As I feel I need to bring up with these lists, these are just my opinions.  There's nothing stopping you from hating these movies just like there's nothing to stop me from enjoying them.  Additionally, just like the last list, there's potentially going to be some talk about the movie plots themselves so SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!  With all that out of the way, let's not waste any more time and dive right in.







XII.  Ghost Rider (2007)



            Now I'm not gonna deny that Mark Steven Johnson is one of the worst directors currently working in Hollywood and there's plenty of stuff to make fun of in this movie.  Still, there were some things about it that I found enjoyable.



            While I thought that Wes Bentley as the devil's son followed by his group of fallen angels made terrible villains, I thought that the representation of each of them by an element was interesting.  For example, Bentley's character, Blackheart (pfft ha ha ha I'm sorry that's just hilarious), first appears as Fire is raining down and the other 3 appear through Earth, Water, and Air (now all they need is Heart.  XD  I'm sorry, I had to make that joke).



            Another Awesome aspect is any time there's actual Ghost Rider onscreen.  By god, one of my favorite moments is when Johnny Blaze (Nicholas Cage) rides all the way to the train yard where he begins transforming into the Rider while the Latin Choir (which I already mentioned in a past post is my favorite cliche) sings in the background (as seen below).  Plus, give Cage extra credit for having one of his traditional acting "freak outs" during that scene.  Also, the design of Ghost Rider's motorcycle is super badass looking.







            One thing that a lot of people were bothered by, but, strangely enough, I wasn't, was the fact that Blaze was the most powerful of all the past Ghost Riders because he sold his soul out of love rather than greed.  That concept I thought was pretty cool.  In fact, a running theme throughout most of this list is that I include movies based off of concept as I'm really big on that factor.



            Still, there's a lot of stuff that's just really goofy here like Cage's actions, the character of Blackheart, a moment where the devil's cartoony shadow is shown at the beginning, an instance of using a Magic 8 Ball at a restaurant, and one character using a lantern in modern times.  Another thing to point out is the missed opportunity for Cage to use this role to deliver a more over-the-top performance like he did in Face/Off.



            But, hey, it was still better than that piece of shit sequel that came out 5 years later.  Thank God that one sucked resulting in the rights reverting back to Marvel.  Now all we need is for the same thing to happen to the Fantastic 4.  Fingers crossed.  :-)







XI.  In Time (2011)



            Like I said before, this movie I mostly like because I find the concept interesting.  I thought that the whole idea of a future where time is literally money was fascinating and they explain how the system works pretty well that each person has a clock genetically engineered in their arm set for a year that starts counting down once they reach 25 whereupon they also cease to age.  Once the clock reaches zero or "times out", the person dies.



            There's some interesting commentary to be made in this movie about the rich constantly robbing from the poor in order to live forever by constantly raising the costs of basic necessities.  I also really liked the relationship (brief though it was) between Will Salas (Justin Timberlake who does a pretty good job of acting here) and his mother Rachel (Olivia Wilde who also stars in another movie to make this list later on) and how they both loved each other to the extent that they were soo willing to give the other some of their own time when both of them are pretty hard pressed for time themselves.



            Additionally, I found Cillian Murphy to be pretty decent as one of the villains, a police-like "Timekeeper".  Even Amanda Seyfried as the daughter of an extremely wealthy time-loaner does a good job of playing the "fish out of water" when she's stuck with Will and learning the importance of time management when every second could be your last.



            But now moving on to what I didn't like about this movie.  I didn't like Fortis or his gang as they just seemed like 1-dimensional villains who only steal time from others... just because.  That was stupid and I loved watching them time out when it finally did happen.  But the other thing is that the story itself isn't anything new.  It's basically a Sci-Fi, dystopian version of Bonnie and Clyde.



            This movie was written, directed, and produced by Andrew Niccol, whose credits also include Sci-Fi cult classic Gattaca, The Truman Show, Lord Of War, and The Terminal (which many of you might remember from my previous Top 12 list) and despite this movie's faults I still find it enjoyable to watch, but maybe that's just the Sci-Fi geek in me.







X.  Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012)


AND

Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013)



            So yeah.  Just like my last list, I have a tie between 2 movies.  The main reason I put these 2 together was because they both have a certain campy charm to them as they take characters we thought we knew and reimagines them as hunters of supernatural beings.



            Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter was originally a mashup novel done in the same style as Pride And Prejudice And Zombies (which I heard is getting its own movie come next year) and Sense And Sensibility And Sea Monsters.  The novel's original author, Seth Grahame-Smith (who also wrote Pride And Prejudice And Zombies), served as screenwriter for the movie while Tim Burton and Timur Bekmambetov helmed it and there was plenty that I enjoyed about this reimagining of the 16th president as a vampire hunter.



            Some of the things I found interesting were how it adds its own spin to the vampire lore.  For instance, according to this movie, the reason vampires are vulnerable to silver dates back to biblical times when Judas betrayed Jesus for the 30 pieces of silver, marking it as a symbol of betrayal.



            Also, those who are pure of heart simply die from a vampire's bite while those whose hearts are tainted are turned.  Some people might've been turned off by the fact that this movie states that some of the vampires were pastors, but people forget how corrupt most Southern pastors were during slavery era America.  I even thought that the logic that vampires can't kill each other as "only the living can kill the dead" was interesting and there were even some kick ass scenes of Honest Abe wielding his silver coated axe against the undead legions.



            Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters, a fun little cult gem, has a lot of interesting stuff going for it.  I found it interesting how Hansel ended up becoming a diabetic from when they were kids first arriving at the gingerbread house where the witch forced him to gorge himself on sweets to fatten him up.



            Also the twist where it's revealed that Hansel and Gretel were descended from a white witch, therefore explaining their invulnerability to black magic, was pretty cool.  And, of course, all the blood and gore was a lot of fun for my dumb male brain to watch.  I've heard that there are plans to make a sequel out of this movie which I'd really like to see as I'd love to watch how this world is expanded upon.



            Both of these movies are pretty goofy when you come to think about it which might be what turns some people off to them, but there are still others who view them as pretty enjoyable.  I personally find myself among the latter category.







IX.  9 (2009)


           Now this was a movie that I was super psyched to see when I first saw the trailer (shown below)






            Based on the 2005 Academy Award Nominated short film of the same name by Shane Acker, this movie, like Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, is helmed by Burton and Bekmambetov as well as Acker himself.  I saw this movie in its original theatrical run (I saw the very first showing with a friend's dad) and I found it fairly enjoyable.



            The animation is impressive as all of the 9 main characters have their own distinct appearance and personalities based off of the many different sides of their creator's own personality.  The different machines are fascinating to see as their designs are inspired by such diverse things as a cat, a pterodactyl, a cobra, and even one that brings to mind a hybrid of an AT-ST walker from Star Wars and an alien tripod from War Of The Worlds.  Also the dreary, sepia toned, Post-Apocalyptic background is amazing to look at (I'm a major sucker for anything Post-Apocalyptic).



            Another aspect that I found interesting was one particular scene where 2 is looking over 9 and makes comments about all the thought and detail that was put into 9's creation.  Acker himself even stated in an interview with scienceblogs.com, "There's some spirituality in [our] creation, some indescribable thing that can't be broken down into scientific terms.  Though we can start to describe [the] brain as a complex collection of nerves that creates thought, you can say that we're complex amino acid collections, how do you describe that consciousness that humans have?"  That's something very rarely brought up in movies.



            The voice acting is also pretty decent from such actors as Elijah Wood, John C. Reilly, Jennifer Connelly, and Christopher Plummer.  In addition to that, the messages of teamwork and even self sacrifice were interesting to see here.  And of course what I really liked was the fact that it was an animated movie that was trying to touch on darker subjects.  We already have an overabundance of brightly, candy-coated, family-friendly, animated movies to the point that more adult animated movies are a welcome breath of fresh air.



            Unfortunately, this movie has some problems when it comes to its pacing and character development.  Another aspect that I could go either way on is that it's a rather short movie, clocking in at about 75 minutes.  On the one hand, it's kind of refreshing that this movie is shorter than other movies that are bloated out with "too long" runtimes.  On the other hand, though, this movie could've been a little bit longer to smooth out some of the character development and pacing problems.  It's a delicate balance.



            Even with its flaws, I still think this movie deserves to be seen by as many people as possible as I feel it's criminally underappreciated.  Feel free to give it a watch for yourself some time.  You might just be surprised.







VIII.  Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull (2008)



            Alright.  Y'all heard me bitch and moan about Temple of Doom in my last list where I said that I consider it to be the worst Indiana Jones movie in the franchise.  If I was ranking all of the movies, Temple of Doom would be rock bottom below Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull, although, when it comes to Raiders Of The Lost Ark or The Last Crusade, I can't decide which is my favorite.



            Some of the things I like about this movie are the villain, Irina Spalko, the return of Marion, and, the one thing that's probably going to make you all hate me, I thought that Shia LeBeouf was actually pretty decent in this movie as Indy's son, Mutt.  Why?  Well, unlike Willie from Temple of Doom who constantly had to have her ass saved while contributing nothing to the group (except to annoy the living piss out of me and others), Mutt proved he could actually take care of himself.  He certainly held his own pretty well in a fencing duel against Spalko on top of moving vehicles.



            I didn't even mind the fact that they were searching for extra-terrestrial artifacts in this movie as I felt it fit in with the time period of the 50s that the movie was set in.  People seem to forget that that decade was when a lot of the Sci-Fi alien invasion movies were coming out.



            But, of course, like most others, I had a problem with the overuse of CGI.  I mean, Mutt swinging from vines with a bunch of CGI monkeys like Tarzan?  Really?  That was stupid.  Also, surviving a nuclear blast in a fridge was dumb, but at the same time, Temple of Doom had people jumping out of an airplane on an inflatable raft before sledding down a slope until they fly off the edge of a cliff into the river below without sustaining any injuries so I give it a pass.



            Personally, despite its flaws, I find this movie far better than most people give it credit for.  Just goes to show you the difference.







VII.  The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)



            This is probably one of my more selfish selections as Electro is my all-time favorite Spider-Man villain because I've always wanted electrical manipulation as a superpower and it was nice to finally see him on the big screen.  Funny story, back in 1991 (my birth year), James Cameron was originally going to make a Spider-Man movie starring Electro as the main villain, but those plans sadly fell through.



            Marc Webb I feel did a good job with modernizing Electro's appearance as that goofy green and yellow get-up from the comics would never work.  Even having Rhino in this heavily armored high tech suit was pretty cool to see.  The death of Gwen Stacy was really sad as I felt she was a far superior love interest for Spidey when compared to Mary Jane Watson from the Raimi Trilogy, which you could say means that there was more of an audience attachment to Gwen as a character.



            Another aspect that I thought was handled really well in this movie was how Peter Parker actually quit being Spider-Man for an extended period of time after Gwen's death, which totally makes sense as pretty much anyone would be shaken up from the death of a loved one, and it's made all the more tragic seeing as he was soo close to saving her.  Compare this to Spider-Man 2 of the Raimi Trilogy where Peter quits being Spider-Man because the job is too hard and really think which of these 2 would you be more able to relate to?



            But of course the problems that this movie has are hard to ignore.  Mostly the fact that it feels more focused on setting itself up for a Sinister Six movie that will never happen now (well that sucks) and therefore is overly bloated with trying to juggle too many elements, side plots, and character developments all at once.  I was pretty annoyed at the fact that Rhino is just thrown in at the last 5 minutes.



            I still think this movie is better than Spider-Man 3 though as I felt Spider-Man 3 terribly handled Venom and the whole "emo Peter Parker" thing was dumb and unforgivable.  Really depressing that this movie is ranked as the worst of the franchise and was the least successful.  :-(






VI.  Tron: Legacy (2010)



            Now I'm gonna be completely honest with you guys, I never saw the original 1982 Tron movie before watching Tron: Legacy.  Still, I don't think that my lack of Tron knowledge kept me from enjoying this movie in any sense because I found plenty of things to like about it.



            I saw this movie in 3-D at an IMAX theater and I can just tell you guys right now that this movie was GORGEOUS to look at.  This was definitely a movie that justifies itself for being released in 3-D unlike others who just use it as a gimmick.  I feel it makes up for me not seeing Avatar in 3-D.



            The whole first half of the movie is really fun as it introduces the audience to the world of The Grid and its rules.  The fight scenes are a lot of fun to watch, all set to the electronic house mixings of Daft Punk (who even make a cameo appearance at the End Of Line nightclub).  Some people had a problem with Jeff Bridges' performance, but I actually thought it was pretty entertaining at times.  The one line that has me pissing my pants with laughter is when he says, "You're messin with my 'Zen thing', man."  Me and my friend Caleb, who I saw the movie with, still quote that line to this day.



            But once the second half comes around is when the plot holes start to show up.  So C.L.U.'s (who's essentially a program clone of Bridges' character) plan is to bring an army he's been raising into the real world to take it over, but isn't that kind of a problem when these programs can just be destroyed by hitting them?  Seriously, one blow and they collapse into pixels or, as they say, they're "derezzed".  Also, earlier on in the movie, the main character of Sam Flynn is trying to sabotage his own company.  Yeah.  Try to make sense of that.



            I still think that this movie is worth seeing even if just for the spectacle alone.  If you have the chance to watch it in 3-D, do it.  You won't regret it.







V.  Atlantis: The Lost Empire (2001)



            Now this was back when Disney was trying to do something different with its animation studio and I think that the style, inspired by Hellboy creator, Mike Mignola, was very interesting as was the culture of Atlantis itself.  Also worth mentioning is that the Atlantean language itself was created by Marc Okrand, the same man who developed the Klingon language in Star Trek.



            I grew up reading a lot of Sci-Fi stories and watching a lot of Sci-Fi movies like 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea, Journey To The Center Of The Earth, War Of The Worlds, and many others so this movie really captured my interest.  The Atlantean technology was very futuristic, alien-like, and almost alternate reality based which I felt fit in well with this movie.



            The characters were all very interesting and memorable from Mole to Audrey to Vinny to Dr. Sweet and even Cookie got a good laugh out of me every once in a while.  Plus, speaking of Star Trek, late legendary actor, Leonard Nimoy, even lends his voice to the King of Atlantis.  I also really loved the music, particularly in the Crystal Chamber.



            What I didn't like though was the villain and his motivations.  They basically discover Atlantis, but he decides to steal the city's life crystal just because it'll make him rich.  I'm just like "DUDE!!!  You discovered a lost civilization.  You're going to be rich anyways.  You don't have to steal this life crystal."  So yeah.  That was stupid.



            Despite bad critical reception, this movie has received a strong cult following as it should.  It's kind of sad that this movie came out during a time where more and more kids were leaning towards CG animation because this is a seriously underappreciated movie and definitely worth a watch if you ever get the chance.







IV.  The Reaping (2007)



            Now I doubt any of you guys have even heard of this movie, but it was one that, when I first found out about it, I really wanted to see it super bad.  Unfortunately for me it was R rated and I wasn't quite old enough to watch it at that time.  I eventually forgot about it over time until just recently when I finally watched it and there were several aspects of it that I enjoyed.



            The whole concept of the 10 Biblical plagues of Exodus striking this small town was the first thing to capture my attention.  I also found it interesting how Hilary Swank's character, Katherine, who has left her faith after her husband and daughter were murdered by the same people they came to help and has since been using scientific means to explain miraculous occurrences, is brought back to her faith when she realizes that these miracles can't be explained through science.



            In addition to this, I thought that the effects were really cool to see as each and every one of the plagues occurred and even a few of the people were very enjoyable and likable.  Some of my favorite characters being Katherine, her assistant, Ben, and a young girl, Loren McConnell, who the inhabitants of this small town believe to be behind these plagues.



            I also really fell in love with the music.  This music shifts back and forth between calm and quiet to loud and boisterous but no matter which of the 2 it's on, there's always a sense of darkness, sinister foreboding, and even dread to it, which one would come to expect in a biblical horror movie (one of my favorite tracks is Locusts as it's loud and boisterous while also containing the Dramatic Choir throughout its entirety).  It's a soundtrack that I would definitely recommend listening to.



            But even with that, the acting, while not godawful, leaves something to be desired.  Also, it kind of bothered me somewhat with some areas where it lacked biblical accuracy with the order in which the plagues happened or even when someone says that Pharaoh's men matched Moses plague for plague when they only matched him for the first few plagues.



            Still, even with those flaws I found it to be relatively enjoyable.  There's nothing really that offensive that I could think of and the plagues were particularly fun to watch, so I'd definitely recommend it.







III.  Star Wars Episode III: Revenge Of The Sith (2005)



            Now, of course, a lot of people have bashed the prequel trilogy to death and there's a lot of stuff to make fun of, but I'm still surprised by all the people who include Episode III in their bashing.  It just boggles my mind when they say nothing good comes from it.



            What I really loved about this movie was how much more action packed it was.  This movie gave us not 1, not 2, not 3, not even 4, but 5 lightsaber duels in its runtime from Anakin and Obi Wan VS. Count Dooku to Yoda VS. The Emperor to Obi Wan VS. Anakin (which has gotta be one of the most intense duels ever put to film).  One thing that the prequels did better than the original trilogy was their lightsaber duels.



            Also watching the Emperor slowly but surely twist Anakin's mind to turn to the Dark Side was interesting as he plays on his fears of losing Padme, which makes it all the more tragic when his own turn to the Dark Side results in her losing the will to live.  Finally I loved how much darker this movie was as it's currently the only Star Wars movie to have a PG-13 rating.  Me and my sister (who wasn't quite a teenager yet) both saw the premiere of this movie and loved it.



            Now, of course, the acting from the majority of the cast isn't particularly good, but people forget how silly some of the acting from the original trilogy could get at times.  Also, that puss out Darth Vader moment at the end where he shouts, "NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" after discovering Padme is dead was really dumb (at least we now know where Luke got it from.  XD  ).



            So yeah.  Don't act like there's absolutely nothing redeemable in the prequels because when something has that much time, money, and, dare I say, effort put into it, it deserves to be acknowledged when all of that pays off and I feel it really does here.







II.  Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (2011)



            Now there were only 2 Pirates movies that I actually saw in theaters: Dead Man's Chest and this one.  I did watch the movies in order, but At World's End I didn't see until several months before On Stranger Tides was released because, in all honesty, it didn't really interest me.  OST was the movie that I really wanted to see as it had Blackbeard, Mermaids, Zombies, and a quest to find the legendary Fountain Of Youth so I begrudgingly watched AWE beforehand and was really bored by it.



            The lack of action throughout the majority of the movie, the convoluted plot, the bloated runtime, the stupid financial currency scandal no one gave a flying fuck about, and all of it leading up to what felt like a half hour of ships circling in a whirlpool left me thinking "Well that sucked.  I guess the next one can only go up from here." and when I got around to seeing OST... I found it to be much better than AWE.



            There was a nice balance of action and calmer moments between scenes that I enjoyed, a lot of that action coming from Penelope Cruz's character, Angelica, who is the type of woman that Keira Knightley should've been.  The music is also really fun with Rodrigo y Gabriela adding a nice Latin American flair to it.  The Mermaids were a very interesting blend of Siren and Vampire with their razor sharp fangs to eat people alive and I even found the 3-D to be pretty decent.  Not phenomenal, but not terrible either.  Not to mention this was also the shortest movie in the franchise.



            One thing that really bothered a lot of people, but, once again, I didn't really mind, was the whole romance sideplot that was going on between the missionary, Phillip, and the Mermaid, Syrena.  One of the things that really bothered me about AWE (and partially DMC) was this whole love triangle bullshit that they were playing with between Will, Elizabeth, and Jack.



            I'm just going to come out and say it right now: I hate when people try to force these stupid love triangles on me because they're very rarely ever done right in my opinion.  The only love triangle that I was seriously invested in was the one between Gale, Katniss, and Peeta from The Hunger Games books (also, possibly Harry, Hermione, and Ron from the Harry Potter movies).  This movie just had one romance between Jack and Angelica and another between Phillip and Syrena.  No love triangle required here.



            But there were some areas that I had problems with.  One of which being the convoluted plot and its pacing.  The reason why this is a bigger problem here than in something like AWE is because, strangely enough, AWE kind of justifies it with having a longer runtime whereas OST has a shorter runtime so it seems like they're just trying to cram as much stuff as they can in at once.



            But the biggest, and I really do mean the biggest, problem that I had was with the character of Blackbeard.  This guy is supposed to be the pirate that all other pirates fear and... he just came off as soo boring and bland compared to the villains that we've been given in past films.  When you take into account all the stuff that's known about the original Blackbeard and how intimidating he was, it just seemed like a wasted opportunity.  I was more invested in Phillip and Syrena than I was in Blackbeard.  That's not a good sign.



            With all that said, though, I'm just really shocked that soo many people praise AWE over OST.  Tony himself had AWE on his list of movies he likes but everyone else hates which I was O.K. with at first until... he tried spreading this bullshit lie that people praise OST over AWE.  O.K. I don't know what planet or alternate reality he's living in because no one praises OST over AWE.  Even WatchMojo.com featured OST on their list of Top 10 Bad Movies That Were Successful.  Not AWE.  OST.  They also went on to say that the first 3 Pirates movies were effortless fun while OST was all effort.



            BULLFUCKINGSHIT!!!  AWE was anything but fun while OST actually felt like a real Pirates movie to me.  Also, did I mention the fact that AWE opens with a little boy being hung at the gallows?  Fucking sign me up for that please.  NOT!!!  So the way I see it, OST is nowhere near as good as The Curse Of The Black Pearl, but it is waaay superior to AWE.  I think I'd put it on about the same level as DMC as I was able to enjoy both of those movies in spite of their flaws.  With all that said, I'm really looking forward to Dead Men Tell No Tales where Jack will go up against ghost pirate, Captain Salazar (played by the always intimidating Javier Bardem), in search of the Legendary Trident Of Poseidon come 2017.







            WARNING!!!  The following entry you're about to see may cause similar side effects to those caused from seeing the #1 entry of my past list.  If you've already experienced these side effects before and do not desire to experience them again, I suggest that you navigate away from this post and find something else to do.  For those of you who choose to stay, once again, you've been warned.  So without any further delay, the #1 Movie I Like But Everyone Else Seems To Hate is...







I.  Charlie And The Chocolate Factory (2005)



            Yeah.  Another Johnny Depp movie.  Something about the majority of his more recent movies turns people off.  When I first found out about this movie several years back and that it was directed by Tim Burton, I was really eager to see this movie.  I was sure that this movie would be far more faithful to the book than Willy Wonka was and I was positive that Burton helming it would be a literal match made in heaven.  But, when I finally did get around to watching it (I believe it was one of the first Tim Burton movies I saw.  Either that or Pee Wee's Big Adventure.), much to my surprise...  I was totally right.  :-)



            Tim Burton was beyond perfect for this movie as he properly handles the wacky and eccentric nature of the story from the original book.  When I first saw this movie, I was under the assumption that everyone else liked this movie also.  It got good critical acclaim and so I thought that there were legions of others who liked it.  Noted, my mom wasn't particularly crazy about it, but I just chalked that up to the fact that she didn't like Tim Burton's work (she didn't even let me see The Nightmare Before Christmas when I was a kid).  Boy was I in for a rude awakening.



            A few years after first seeing Charlie, I came across a WatchMojo.com video of the Top 10 Worst Hollywood Remakes which Charlie landed on (one of the things that really pisses me off is when people refer to Charlie as a remake of Willy Wonka when it's not.  It's an adaptation of the original book for god's sake) where they proceeded to rip apart everything about this movie, referring to Charlie's Oompa Loompas as "unlikable" (Fuck you WatchMojo!!!  These Oompa Loompas were adorable and didn't give me nightmares like Willy Wonka's did) and stating that Johnny Depp as Willy Wonka was just a bad Michael Jackson impression (another thing that pisses me off as, if they had done any research, they would've known that Depp's Wonka was based off of kid's show hosts like Bob Keeshan and Fred Rogers, the latter of whom I actually saw a little bit of in Depp's performance, and that Depp's Wonka couldn't stand children while Michael Jackson loved children, but more on that later).



            I think I've made it very clear by this point that I'm not necessarily the biggest fan of WatchMojo.com.  I often compare WatchMojo.com to the Oscar's for the following reasons:  I.  I rarely ever agree with them, II.  They leave me really pissed off after watching them, and III.  For some unknown reason, I keep going back to it.  It's essentially an abusive relationship, but I digress.



            I said before that no movie is perfect and this movie isn't either.  Still, though, I feel like it came much closer to properly representing the original spirit of the book it was based on.  Charlie here is just the way that I imagined him from the book: kind, positive thinking, and selfless.  I also really enjoyed the stories that Grandpa Joe told about the many unusual confections Wonka created in his earlier years and even the story from the book of Prince Pondicherry and his chocolate palace.  The visuals were really great (as one would come to expect from Tim Burton) and I really loved how they modernized some of the characters.



            Violet Beauregarde (played by AnnaSophia Robb, who also played Loren McConnell in The Reaping), for instance, was updated from a mere gum enthusiast to the competitive daughter of a soccer mom who's always pushing her to win at everything, creating a superiority complex in her daughter in the process.  Also, Mike Teavee, while he still loves watching TV, is updated to being really big into excessively violent video games.  Even his parents seem very passive about it as if they're more than happy to let their son be raised by technology.



            The music was also a lot of fun to listen to as it has a very wacky and zany feel to it.  Danny Elfman provides both the score and the vocals for the songs (his first time singing since 1993's The Nightmare Before Christmas) which were a ton of fun.  The Oompa Loompa songs here were taken directly from the book and each one was given its own unique style and sound from a Bollywood mambo to 70s funk to 60s psychedelic pop to 70s-80s hard rock.  I still find myself singing them to this day.  Wonka's Welcome Song can get annoying at times (I personally have a love/hate relationship with it), but, in all honesty, give me that over the Oompa Loompa song from Willy Wonka any day.



            But now it's time to discuss the big elephant in the room:  Johnny Depp as Willy Wonka.  While I will admit that his acting can get grating at times, I did find some of his performance to be enjoyable.  There were certain lines from the book that I remembered reading like when Veruca introduces herself to Wonka and he says, "I always thought a veruca was a type of wart you got on the bottom of your foot" or even when Mike repeatedly says something Wonka doesn't like and he constantly tells Mike not to mumble.  I loved those moments from the book and was glad to see them used in the movie.  Side note: My brother was in a local theater production of Charlie And The Chocolate Factory and they incorporated both the veruca joke and the mumbling comment in the script.  If a local theater is smart enough to use these jokes, you know they're good.



            I also thought that he handled the eccentric, mischievous, and sometimes even asshole side of Wonka from the book very well.  Many people probably had a problem with the fact that he didn't even bother to learn the kids' names or that he seemed kind of nasty towards the 4 bratty kids (but at the same time I also felt was the proper level of polite to Charlie).  As far as I'm concerned, though, I just associated that with his godlike omniscience that I remembered from the book.  Additionally, people condemn Depp's Wonka for his lack of concern for the children's safety.  Oh yeah.  Because Gene Wilder's Wonka from the first movie wasn't in any way like that at all.  Uneducated dumbasses!



            I found it kind of interesting when they decided to give Wonka more of a backstory to sort of explain how he ended up becoming this eccentric, reclusive shut-in.  It was certainly interesting seeing the late great Sir Christopher Lee playing Wonka's dad, a dentist who was completely opposed to Willy becoming a chocolatier.



            Now, if you'll allow me to diverge slightly off topic, I'm a huge fan of the Nostalgia Critic, but there's one particular video of his that I don't like: his Old VS. New of Willy Wonka VS. Charlie.  For those of you unfamiliar with Old VS. New, it's a series he does where he compares 2 similar movies from different periods (King Kong 1933 VS. 2005, Batman (1989) VS. The Dark Knight (2008), True Grit 1969 VS. 2010, Ten Commandments VS. Prince Of Egypt, etc.) that he views as being pretty equal to each other.



            The only problem is he doesn't view Charlie as being equal to Willy Wonka so his arguments are completely biased from the get go.  He's soo blinded by nostalgia that he praises the aspects of Willy Wonka that stray from the source material and yet he criticizes the aspects of Charlie that remain the most faithful to it.  In fact, I'm wondering if he's even read the damn book!



            Now there was an episode of Old VS. New where he compared Sam Raimi's Spider-Man Trilogy to Marc Webb's Spider-Man movies and he was pretty biased towards the latter, but even then he had someone there to argue for the Raimi movies so that it was a fair fight.  In addition to that, they actually referenced the source material (in this case the Spider-Man comics) when making their arguments, something that the NC didn't even bother doing with the Willy Wonka VS. Charlie battle.  I have the feeling that if I was in a redone Willy Wonka VS. Charlie fight, I could definitely give the Critic a run for his money.  I don't necessarily know if I'd win, but I'd certainly give Charlie more of a fighting chance than he ever did.



            When I was doing research on this movie, I actually came across an article where Gene Wilder was quoted as calling Charlie And The Chocolate Factory "an insult", more specifically "Warner Bros.' insult".  This got me particularly pissed off because Dahl's estate, particularly his widow and daughter, fully approved of Burton's vision for the movie.  So if that's the case, who is this movie really an insult to?  Is it an insult to Dahl himself or is it an insult to Wilder?



            It then occurred to me that Wilder himself is a bit of an egotist here.  He apparently can't stand the idea of there being another adaptation of the book other than the one he was the star of.  I don't care if people hate me for this or if it's too controversial of an opinion (being a Brony, controversial opinions are nothing new as, to state a few examples, I didn't mind Twilight becoming an Alicorn Princess in the Season 3 Finale, I didn't hate Equestria Girls like everyone else did, and I thought Flash Sentry was a pretty decent character, not deserving of all the hate he's been getting lately, but I digress) this is just how I saw all of this.



            Personally, I'm also of the very controversial opinion that neither Gene Wilder nor Johnny Depp properly portrayed the Wonka that I remembered from the book.  Wilder seemed to focus more on the charming whimsical side of Wonka while Depp focused more on the eccentric mischievous side of Wonka.  Both actors cranked their portrayals up to 11 where with Wilder it felt very pedo and uncomfortable at times and with Depp it felt very grating and awkward at other times (and why I don't see Depp's portrayal as being pedo was because he couldn't stand kids except for Charlie who, like I said earlier, he was the proper level of polite around).



            In my opinion, the proper Wonka would have to be a combination of both Wilder and Depp's portrayals in equal amounts.  All I can say is if you like Charlie And The Chocolate Factory, maybe we can be close friends.  If you like Willy Wonka, that's perfectly fine only as long as you don't bash Charlie in favor of it, in which case there will be a pretty nasty bloodbath to follow.  But if by some miracle of God you're someone who happens to like both Willy Wonka and Charlie equally, then you're clearly a far better person than I am.







            So that was my list of the Top 12 Movies I Like, But Everyone Else Hates and I'd like to know what's a movie that you really enjoy but everyone else seems to hate?  Anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed this list (and my last list) and I hope I didn't piss off too many people with my opinions (I probably did anyways).  In the meantime I hope you guys have a great week and I'll see you on the next blog post.  Take care.